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Rounded Propshaft Bolts!!!


benbenukuk

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Probably useful to follow this translation of the Haynes book of lies

Haynes: Rotate anticlockwise.

Translation: Clamp with molegrips then beat repeatedly with hammer

anticlockwise.

Haynes: This is a snug fit.

Translation: Clamp with molegrips then beat repeatedly with hammer.

Haynes: This is a tight fit.

Translation: Clamp with molegrips then beat repeatedly with a hammer.

Haynes: As described in Chapter 7...

Translation: That'll teach you not to read through before you start.

Now you are looking at scary photos of the inside of a gearbox.

Haynes: Pry...

Translation: Hammer a screwdriver into...

Haynes: Undo...

Translation: Go buy a tin of WD40 (giant economy size).

Haynes: Retain tiny spring...

Translation: PINGGGG - "Jesus, where the hell did that go?"

Haynes: Press and rotate to remove bulb...

Translation: OK - that's the glass bit off, now fetch some good pliers

to dig out the bayonet part (and maybe a plaster or two).

Haynes: Lightly...

Translation: Start off lightly and build up till the veins on your

forehead are throbbing then clamp with molegrips then beat repeatedly

with hammer.

Haynes: Weekly checks...

Translation: If it isn't broken don't fix it.

Haynes: Routine maintenance...

Translation: If it isn't broken, it's about to be. We warned you.

Haynes: One spanner rating.

Translation: An infant could do this... so how did you manage to ****

it up?

Haynes: Two spanner rating.

Translation: Now you may think that you can do this because two is a

low, teensy weensy number... but you also thought the wiring diagram

was a map of the Tokyo underground (in fact that would have been more

use to you).

Haynes: Three spanner rating.

Translation: Make sure you won't need your motor for a couple of

days.

Haynes: Four spanner rating.

Translation: You're not seriously considering this are you?

Haynes: Five spanner rating.

Translation: OK - but don't ever carry your loved ones in it again.

Haynes: If not, you can fabricate your own special tool like this...

Translation: Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.

Haynes: Compress...

Translation: Squeeze with all your might, jump up and down on it,

throw it at the garage wall, then find some molegrips and a hammer...

Haynes: Inspect...

Translation: Squint at really hard and pretend you know what you are

looking at, then declare in a loud knowing voice to your wife "Yep, as

I thought, it's going to need a new one"

Haynes: Carefully...

Translation: You are about to suffer deep abrasions.

Haynes: Retaining nut...

Translation: Yes, that's it, that big spherical blob of rust.

Haynes: Get an assistant...

Translation: Prepare to humiliate yourself in front of someone you

know.

Haynes: Turning the engine will be easier with the spark plugs

removed.

Translation: However, starting the engine afterwards will be much

harder. Once that sinking pit of your stomach feeling has subsided,

you can start to feel deeply ashamed as you gingerly refit the spark

plugs.

Haynes: Refitting is the reverse sequence to removal.

Translation: Yeah, right. But you swear in different places.

Haynes: Prise away plastic locating pegs...

Translation: Snap off...

Haynes: Using a suitable drift...

Translation: Clamp with molegrips then beat repeatedly with hammer.

Haynes: Everyday toolkit

Translation: RAC Card & Mobile Phone

Haynes: Apply moderate heat...

Translation: Unless you have a blast furnace, don't bother.

Alternatively, clamp with molegrips then beat repeatedly with hammer.

Haynes: Index

Translation: List of all the things in the book, bar what you need to

do.

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ahh every time, I dig the prop shaft tool out I get that lovely warm feeling that this was maybe best 15quid I ever spent! honestly makes a pain in the arse job which requires struggling on you back with spanners and bad fitting sockets take a minute with an airgun.

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Couldnt agree more. I refuse point blank with prop shafts without the "tool" i'd send my truck to a garage and happily pay daft labour rates if it means i dont have to touch a prop shafts with two 9/16th spanners.

Thankfully a propshaft tool and a impact driver there off and on in seconds! i'd love to buy that man who made this tool a pint!

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i bought a really cheapy socket/ratchet set many years ago in one of them plastic roll bags to live in the emergency box in the car, the sockets are that thin that they go on the propshaft nuts quite happily. I think its only the decent quality robust tools that dont fit.

good job really cos i lost my difflock prop tool some time ago...

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