The "Pass the Bucket" 4x4 For Sale on Ebay Thread

[Snagger]

They said he had a stroke, but I wouldn’t be surprised if it was vodka related.

[JohnnoK]

6 hours ago, Snagger said:

They said he had a stroke, but I wouldn’t be surprised if it was vodka related.

They'd hardly admit he was soused, though....

I spent a while in Mozambique on contract to supply helicopters to the UN operation there and had the misfortune of flying from Maputo to Beira in an Antonov 24 with around a dozen fellow unfortunates.

It has seats down the sides of the plane and the cargo is placed on the floor at your feet. No seatbelts, because it is an ex-military machine and no net over the cargo, which caused the UN aviation guy to blow a fuse at that so they fitted belts and supplied a net. The seatbelts were a random collection of stuff scavenged from the various aircraft scattered around the airfield in different stages of disrepair/dismantling, but each seat had a belt, some even had a pair of belts, and the lucky few had a matching belt that actually clipped together, but they had belts.... the cargo net was ceremoniously thrown over the cargo and not tied down. The pre-take off briefing was to the point... "You sit, put seatbelt. Don't get up, and if we crash, you do this" with the pilot simulating the brace position and getting in the cockpit, but I digress....

We load up around 6am and trundle off to the end of the runway where the pilot lines up and winds the donks up to full chat and holds them for a few minutes to let the blades creep and give maximum power before we set sail into the yonder. As the pilot rotates, the door to the cockpit swings open and we are left with the view of a bottle being handed to and fro between the pilots as we climb out en route to Beira....😬🥴

That same company elected to do a short take off with an Antonov 32, the over-engined brother of the An-24 and did a taxi-way take off from Maputo, just as they got airborne and tucked the landing gear and flaps, up the tailwind caught up with them and they plonked back onto the runway and skidded off into the grass, closing Maputo International for the rest of the day while the UN got a big forklift to lift one wing at a time to drop the gear so they could drag it off to the boneyard with the rest of the Russian gear.

Russians and planes are not necessarily a good mix....

[FridgeFreezer]

Reminds me of an old Aeroflot joke, the punchline being "If we lose any more engines we'll be up here all night!"

[sean f]

Not had anything quite as exciting as Aeroflot seems to be but over they years been on a few dodgy flights in the UK.

On the way home staging through Scatsta Airport in the Shetlands (now shut) flight to Aberdeen, taxied to the end of the runway, pilot revved the engine and one started making banging noises, throttled down and back up again, more banging noises and oil coming out the bottom, pilot "we seem to have an issue with an engine you will all have to get off and walk back to the terminal". We looked out the window at the growing puddle of oil, yes definitely a problem!.

Another Dash 8 from Exeter airport, landing gear failed to come up and then wouldn't go back down properly, a bit of circling and an emergency landing.

Helicopter from Aberdeen, I think it was an old Bell of some sort, windscreen broke just as we were going over the coast line, slow return to the airport.

S76 from North Denes in Great Yarmouth (also now shut) and emergency abort on take of as we diced a seagull.

Helicopter from Aberdeen, divert and emergency landing at Sumburgh Shetlands due to an indicated gearbox fault, turned out it was a new gearbox and there was enough initial wear to generate enough swarf to trigger an alarm, we were told it is basically a magnet with to contacts, if carp builds up enough to make a contact it triggers the alarm. A genuine alarm but not a true fault this time but subsequent to that a series of the same type helicopters crashed in the North Sea with losses of all lives onboard due to a gearbox fault, supposedly the "fault" was found and fixed twice but more flights crashed each time and eventually the aircrafts (EC225) were all withdrawn as people were refusing to get on them, we now mostly use S92's.

Might seem a few but I have done 12 flights so far this year and will hopefully be heading home tomorrow which will involve three separate flights so the numbers rack up.

[Stellaghost]

15 minutes ago, sean f said:

Not had anything quite as exciting as Aeroflot seems to be but over they years been on a few dodgy flights in the UK.

On the way home staging through Scatsta Airport in the Shetlands (now shut) flight to Aberdeen, taxied to the end of the runway, pilot revved the engine and one started making banging noises, throttled down and back up again, more banging noises and oil coming out the bottom, pilot "we seem to have an issue with an engine you will all have to get off and walk back to the terminal". We looked out the window at the growing puddle of oil, yes definitely a problem!.

Another Dash 8 from Exeter airport, landing gear failed to come up and then wouldn't go back down properly, a bit of circling and an emergency landing.

Helicopter from Aberdeen, I think it was an old Bell of some sort, windscreen broke just as we were going over the coast line, slow return to the airport.

S76 from North Denes in Great Yarmouth (also now shut) and emergency abort on take of as we diced a seagull.

Helicopter from Aberdeen, divert and emergency landing at Sumburgh Shetlands due to an indicated gearbox fault, turned out it was a new gearbox and there was enough initial wear to generate enough swarf to trigger an alarm, we were told it is basically a magnet with to contacts, if carp builds up enough to make a contact it triggers the alarm. A genuine alarm but not a true fault this time but subsequent to that a series of the same type helicopters crashed in the North Sea with losses of all lives onboard due to a gearbox fault, supposedly the "fault" was found and fixed twice but more flights crashed each time and eventually the aircrafts (EC225) were all withdrawn as people were refusing to get on them, we now mostly use S92's.

Might seem a few but I have done 12 flights so far this year and will hopefully be heading home tomorrow which will involve three separate flights so the numbers rack up.

Remind me to never get on a plane with you...............lol

Regards Stephen

[miketomcat]

10 hours ago, Stellaghost said:

Remind me to never get on a plane with you...............lol

Regards Stephen

Funny I was thinking the same thing.

[CwazyWabbit]

I don't know, the fact he is still here to tell the tales makes him quite lucky I think 😉

[JohnnoK]

On 4/8/2024 at 9:00 PM, sean f said:

Not had anything quite as exciting as Aeroflot seems to be but over they years been on a few dodgy flights in the UK.

On the way home staging through Scatsta Airport in the Shetlands (now shut) flight to Aberdeen, taxied to the end of the runway, pilot revved the engine and one started making banging noises, throttled down and back up again, more banging noises and oil coming out the bottom, pilot "we seem to have an issue with an engine you will all have to get off and walk back to the terminal". We looked out the window at the growing puddle of oil, yes definitely a problem!.

Another Dash 8 from Exeter airport, landing gear failed to come up and then wouldn't go back down properly, a bit of circling and an emergency landing.

Helicopter from Aberdeen, I think it was an old Bell of some sort, windscreen broke just as we were going over the coast line, slow return to the airport.

S76 from North Denes in Great Yarmouth (also now shut) and emergency abort on take of as we diced a seagull.

Helicopter from Aberdeen, divert and emergency landing at Sumburgh Shetlands due to an indicated gearbox fault, turned out it was a new gearbox and there was enough initial wear to generate enough swarf to trigger an alarm, we were told it is basically a magnet with to contacts, if carp builds up enough to make a contact it triggers the alarm. A genuine alarm but not a true fault this time but subsequent to that a series of the same type helicopters crashed in the North Sea with losses of all lives onboard due to a gearbox fault, supposedly the "fault" was found and fixed twice but more flights crashed each time and eventually the aircrafts (EC225) were all withdrawn as people were refusing to get on them, we now mostly use S92's.

Might seem a few but I have done 12 flights so far this year and will hopefully be heading home tomorrow which will involve three separate flights so the numbers rack up.

The old Bell was likely a 212, lovely old machines, but they were sloooow.

I had an S76 slice and dice a Cattle Egret on the apron outside the hangar in Port Harcourt, 2 come back at different times with birds wedged into the barrier filters and one with an electrical short that cooked the paint off the horizontal stabiliser. More than a few chip lights over the years, one or two of which required a boat trip and that damnable Billy Pugh object of terror to get on board the platform to fix the fault.

The 225s are fixed now, but strangely, they never stopped flying them in Brazil and never had any issues with them, plus, all the ex oil and gas machines are flying in SAR, fire fighting, heavy utility work all over the world and without incident since the problem was addressed. Sikorsky is struggling with their supply chain and there are over 30 S92s grounded for main transmission overhauls and many others being cannibalised for spares to keep the fleet in the air until Lockheed wakes up to the fact that Sikorsky also does civilian machines apart from the military stuff they wanted to get their hands on when they bought Sikorsky.

All in all, my 34 years fixing choppers has been interesting and thoroughly enjoyable, I've learned 3 new languages and seen parts of the world I'd maybe only have seen on TV.

[sean f]

5 hours ago, JohnnoK said:

The old Bell was likely a 212, lovely old machines, but they were sloooow.

I had an S76 slice and dice a Cattle Egret on the apron outside the hangar in Port Harcourt, 2 come back at different times with birds wedged into the barrier filters and one with an electrical short that cooked the paint off the horizontal stabiliser. More than a few chip lights over the years, one or two of which required a boat trip and that damnable Billy Pugh object of terror to get on board the platform to fix the fault.

The 225s are fixed now, but strangely, they never stopped flying them in Brazil and never had any issues with them, plus, all the ex oil and gas machines are flying in SAR, fire fighting, heavy utility work all over the world and without incident since the problem was addressed. Sikorsky is struggling with their supply chain and there are over 30 S92s grounded for main transmission overhauls and many others being cannibalised for spares to keep the fleet in the air until Lockheed wakes up to the fact that Sikorsky also does civilian machines apart from the military stuff they wanted to get their hands on when they bought Sikorsky.

All in all, my 34 years fixing choppers has been interesting and thoroughly enjoyable, I've learned 3 new languages and seen parts of the world I'd maybe only have seen on TV.

Flew in off the rig last night going vis Sumburgh and down south this morning, now hopefully get a couple of weeks off.

Flying offshore for nearly 30 years with flights to get to and from Aberdeen or other parts of the world and often staging through the Shetlands you do enough flights that thing happen eventually!.

I did hear they never had any problems with the 225's anywhere else but don't think they ever worked out why it was happening in the North Sea but not anywhere else, I assume the parts would have all came from the same source, there was a strong push from the work force to get rid of them. Trust was lost when it was announced they were safe after the first crash then another went in, announced they were safe again, another went in, after that no one believed them again.

I have seen aircraft out of action on helidecks for various reasons, mostly bird strikes, always involves a bunch of equipment and a tech coming out by boat even if its just to strap it up for craning off, don't think anyone likes the billy pugh still have them out there.

Never forgot when a rig near us had a bird strike and in the evening meeting the American oil company rep asked if we had any bird deterrents onboard and the Scottish toolpusher replying "yeah a roustabout with a ***** great stick" that evening we had a roustabout on the helideck swinging a broom above his head, never worked they took of circled around and then once he left landed and when back to sleep.

I did wonder about the S92's we still mostly use them but are also using various AW models on some routes.

[Snagger]

I remember Chinooks and Super Pumas having gear box issues in civil use, but seem to have been ok in military use.

Sea gulls are surprisingly solid and heavy birds.  I have destroyed a couple of radomes in striking them, one at less than 200kts.  Had a hell of a mess when I took one down a 737 engine as I was stowing the reversers - it took the engineer over an hour to clean it all out, but luckily no damage as the engine was at idle,

[JohnnoK]

20 hours ago, sean f said:

Flew in off the rig last night going vis Sumburgh and down south this morning, now hopefully get a couple of weeks off.

Flying offshore for nearly 30 years with flights to get to and from Aberdeen or other parts of the world and often staging through the Shetlands you do enough flights that thing happen eventually!.

I did hear they never had any problems with the 225's anywhere else but don't think they ever worked out why it was happening in the North Sea but not anywhere else, I assume the parts would have all came from the same source, there was a strong push from the work force to get rid of them. Trust was lost when it was announced they were safe after the first crash then another went in, announced they were safe again, another went in, after that no one believed them again.

I have seen aircraft out of action on helidecks for various reasons, mostly bird strikes, always involves a bunch of equipment and a tech coming out by boat even if its just to strap it up for craning off, don't think anyone likes the billy pugh still have them out there.

Never forgot when a rig near us had a bird strike and in the evening meeting the American oil company rep asked if we had any bird deterrents onboard and the Scottish toolpusher replying "yeah a roustabout with a ***** great stick" that evening we had a roustabout on the helideck swinging a broom above his head, never worked they took of circled around and then once he left landed and when back to sleep.

I did wonder about the S92's we still mostly use them but are also using various AW models on some routes.

There were 2 suppliers of the planetary gear system that failed and all the failures were traced to the one supplier. There was an emergency airworthiness directive to remove the parts and swap out the planetary gearbox section with the identified parts in it.  We had a 225 parked up in Yangon that had the bad parts in it and once the replacement parts were fitted, we flew it to Singapore for storage and then it went back to the Head Orifice in France and is now a test and development machine for Airbus on a military project. We landed a contract in Namibia for 2 225s and had to lease one in from Bond in Australia and the other was a machine we had in a heavy maintenance check that were sent down to Luderitz.

I've been doing maintenance on choppers since 1990, started on the S61 as my first type rating, then Bell 206 Series and the S76 Series. Got the Bell 212 after my time with Bristow in Nigeria and added the 412 a few years ago. I've recently done the AW139 course and am getting my paperwork together to add the rating to my license now. I've been mostly in West Africa...Angola, Nigeria, Gabon, Ivory Coast, and Namibia & Mozambique on the southern end, but had 2 stints in South America, Brazil for 18 moths and Venezuela for 2 years, plus a year in Thailand and 4 years in Myanmar. I'm in Gabon now after 2 years in PNG.

Fun times!!!😀

[JohnnoK]

13 hours ago, Snagger said:

I remember Chinooks and Super Pumas having gear box issues in civil use, but seem to have been ok in military use.

Sea gulls are surprisingly solid and heavy birds.  I have destroyed a couple of radomes in striking them, one at less than 200kts.  Had a hell of a mess when I took one down a 737 engine as I was stowing the reversers - it took the engineer over an hour to clean it all out, but luckily no damage as the engine was at idle,

The Chinooks had a very bad crash off Sumbugh which killed 45 people and put paid to the Chinook flying offshore. The forward transmission had a catastrophic failure and the 2 rotor systems came out of synch and the blades hit each other, dropping the machine in the sea. Those machines are still flying for Columbia Helicopters mostly doing fire work in various parts of the world.

A mate of mine hit a Cormorant with a Bell Jet Ranger and it came in the lower chin bubble window and splattered itself on the tail rotor pedals before depositing itself all over the interior. Gave him a massive bruise on his feet from the impact, too. Wasn't fun cleaning that out....

Edited April 11 by JohnnoK

[Snagger]

One of our 777s hit a flamingo (they migrate through DXB) and it tore a big hole in the forward fuselage by the FO’s feet.  That was very surprising, given the oblique nature of the impact and how sturdy a 777 is.  A former colleague hit a Golden Eagle in a Vulcan - it went through the wing leading edge and front spar and damaged the main spar.  There was a bit of a fuss by the authorities about killing the bird, less concern over nearly killing the crew and airframe…. I see so many guys asking to maintain high speed below 10,000’, but it just isn’t worth the risk.

 

Sorry for the tangent, everyone! 😬

[CwazyWabbit]

1 hour ago, Snagger said:

--SNIP--

Sorry for the tangent, everyone! 😬

I've enjoyed it

[Junglie]

On 4/11/2024 at 5:12 PM, JohnnoK said:

The Chinooks had a very bad crash off Sumbugh which killed 45 people and put paid to the Chinook flying offshore. The forward transmission had a catastrophic failure and the 2 rotor systems came out of synch and the blades hit each other, dropping the machine in the sea. Those machines are still flying for Columbia Helicopters mostly doing fire work in various parts of the world.

A mate of mine hit a Cormorant with a Bell Jet Ranger and it came in the lower chin bubble window and splattered itself on the tail rotor pedals before depositing itself all over the interior. Gave him a massive bruise on his feet from the impact, too. Wasn't fun cleaning that out....

I hit a sheep in a Lynx doing a night time low flying exercise. That made a hell of a mess... I also hit a barbed wire fence in a Wessex, which was quite exciting as it didn't want to come out of the ground.

Aeroflot. Climbing out of Sheremetyevo heading for Irkutsk and as we rotate my seat slides back in its runners until it's resting on the bloke behind me's knees. Stupidly steep approach to Irkutsk and the revers happens - I slide forward 'til my knees are against the seat back ahead of me.

Another hop and we suddenly stopped climbing at about 5000 feet. Like top of a roller coaster suddenly. 15 minutes or so and my translator/FSB escort goes to see what's going on. Comes back, sparks up a fag and advises me that "Is OK. The window fall out but we stay low." Which we did. For 8 hours...

[Junglie]

9 hours ago, Snagger said:

One of our 777s hit a flamingo (they migrate through DXB) and it tore a big hole in the forward fuselage by the FO’s feet.  That was very surprising, given the oblique nature of the impact and how sturdy a 777 is.  A former colleague hit a Golden Eagle in a Vulcan - it went through the wing leading edge and front spar and damaged the main spar.  There was a bit of a fuss by the authorities about killing the bird, less concern over nearly killing the crew and airframe…. I see so many guys asking to maintain high speed below 10,000’, but it just isn’t worth the risk.

 

Sorry for the tangent, everyone! 😬

Oh, and hit a flock of seagulls in a Hunter T8 when we found a ploughed field that wasn't in NOTAMS. I was on a jolly but had the stick at the time. Jet pipe temp went up, nose came up (despite having the stick all the way forward), revs dropped, P1 says (very calmly) "I have control. Eject. Eject. Eject." And that's how I joined the Caterpillar Club.

[Stellaghost]

4 minutes ago, Junglie said:

I hit a sheep in a Lynx doing a night time low flying exercise. 

One way to get the BBQ steaks......

Regards Stephen 

[FridgeFreezer]

On 4/12/2024 at 7:08 AM, Snagger said:

A former colleague hit a Golden Eagle in a Vulcan

Two rare birds in one anecdote!

[JohnnoK]

On 4/12/2024 at 6:25 PM, Junglie said:

I hit a sheep in a Lynx doing a night time low flying exercise.

 

Blimey! At night, too, that's impressive.

All my flying has been civvy, I was a Pongo in my military days, and served an apprenticeship into aviation. I was rear crew hoist operator and loadie in the S61s doing ship resupply, salvage and general cargo work like planting aircon towers on buildings etc for a few hundred hours before the change to oil and gas and that was some great work. Putting a genset the size of a small car on the bridge wing of a bulker to try and restore power and then pumps, shoring timbers, welding bottles, salvage guys etc over the next day or so really sharpened the focus. I once winched a guy into the sea alongside a yacht that was floundering so he could swim over and (try to) climb onboard to attempt to sail it into Cape Town after the owners abandoned her....that was scary. I've been waist deep in the Atlantic 200 miles due south of Cape Agulhas as the "dope on the rope" for a medevac before making it onboard in 7 to 10 meter seas. That water was COLD!!!

[FridgeFreezer]

I can't decide if this is great or awful:

https://www.theautopian.com/this-aston-martin-v12-swapped-range-rover-can-get-absolutely-none-more-british/

Certainly I'm not about to bid on it

[landroversforever]

That one looks a bit strange and I'm not sure I can pin point why  

[elbekko]

40k seems a bargain for that, even if it needs repainting.

[miketomcat]

2 hours ago, landroversforever said:

That one looks a bit strange and I'm not sure I can pin point why  

The quad headlights me thinks.

Mike

[ThreePointFive]

It also sits weirdly on its suspension, look at the rear wheel arch gap. 

[landroversforever]

17 minutes ago, ThreePointFive said:

It also sits weirdly on its suspension, look at the rear wheel arch gap. 

 

29 minutes ago, miketomcat said:

The quad headlights me thinks.

Mike

I think it’s a combo of these two. I was going to say it looks a little tall and narrow.