muddychris300tdi Posted September 14, 2013 Share Posted September 14, 2013 Glad to hear your doing well. Keep strong. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tacr2man Posted September 14, 2013 Share Posted September 14, 2013 I dont know you , but am glad to hear that you are staying positive, your response to your partners intent , is very much the right one , keeping it amicable is by far the best way from experience ! as either way the outcome is much the same. You are still at a point where there is much to be positive about making the rest of your life , the later things happen the harder it is . after all we are by nature optimistic otherwise we wouldnt drive landrovers Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted February 25, 2014 Share Posted February 25, 2014 So after a break from the internet this forum and land rovering in general I am getting back on the horse so to speak... Just a quick thank you for all of the emails and PM's asking after my health, I have not been getting notifications so sorry for the people who thought that I was ignoring them, I wasn't honestly.... So I won't pretend that life has been easy or a bed of roses since my last update, but it is starting to pick up or at least level off. At time of writing this I find myself off work again and have been since November. Unfortunately and despite my best efforts I took a slide back down and required the help over Christmas to find my way back to the path of good mental health. For any of you reading this who are having similar issues, my only advise would be stick with it things will get better.... I know that sounds an easy thing to say but really it's not and in the dark times it is very easy to loose perspective and forgot that message, I know I have. Things are starting to turn around for me, my divorce was granted last week, my new relationship goes from strength to strength so does the relationship with my Son and I am hoping to be well enough to return to work soon, although there has been no pressure from them about this and in fact they couldn't have been better and more supportive. In short life is starting to move forward for me again, I am not out of the woods yet but am on the right track and starting to put my life back together a bit at a time. the big lesson that I have however learnt is that no matter how bad things look, there is always hope and it often comes from the place that you didn't expect it. Anyway things are good, time to dust off the Defender and start to plan projects and trips for the summer and am starting to rebuild my life in a healthy and productive way. Thanks, Jason. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JeffR Posted February 25, 2014 Share Posted February 25, 2014 So after a break from the internet this forum and land rovering in general I am getting back on the horse so to speak... Just a quick thank you for all of the emails and PM's asking after my health, I have not been getting notifications so sorry for the people who thought that I was ignoring them, I wasn't honestly.... So I won't pretend that life has been easy or a bed of roses since my last update, but it is starting to pick up or at least level off. At time of writing this I find myself off work again and have been since November. Unfortunately and despite my best efforts I took a slide back down and required the help over Christmas to find my way back to the path of good mental health. For any of you reading this who are having similar issues, my only advise would be stick with it things will get better.... I know that sounds an easy thing to say but really it's not and in the dark times it is very easy to loose perspective and forgot that message, I know I have. Things are starting to turn around for me, my divorce was granted last week, my new relationship goes from strength to strength so does the relationship with my Son and I am hoping to be well enough to return to work soon, although there has been no pressure from them about this and in fact they couldn't have been better and more supportive. In short life is starting to move forward for me again, I am not out of the woods yet but am on the right track and starting to put my life back together a bit at a time. the big lesson that I have however learnt is that no matter how bad things look, there is always hope and it often comes from the place that you didn't expect it. Anyway things are good, time to dust off the Defender and start to plan projects and trips for the summer and am starting to rebuild my life in a healthy and productive way. Thanks, Jason. Glad to hear your good news kidda Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ejparrott Posted February 25, 2014 Share Posted February 25, 2014 All good news chap, all good news Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CwazyWabbit Posted February 25, 2014 Share Posted February 25, 2014 Welcome back to dirty fingernails Jason Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HoSS Posted February 25, 2014 Share Posted February 25, 2014 Well done Jason, I really wish you all the best. I just wanted to say that it must have taken great courage to post your story here. But its clear that doing so has helped you i think, and been thought provoking for those who followed it. I'm touched and heartened how our community has rallied round and shown a sensitive side to our otherwise rough, tough off-roader stereotype. So with all of that in mind, i'll admit that i had a pretty awful 2013. Separation, divorce, moving etc all of which has left me with chronic insomnia and moderate depression. I've been signed off work for the last 6 weeks, and trying to use this time to get myself back on the rails. I hope i still have a job when its time to go back. I also think that you were fortunate with the support your employer gave you. For me it has been nothing like that. My boss(es) didnt know really how to deal with it, and i got very little practical support. The worst of which was the crappy sickpay scheme left me without pay for January, and not sure when or how much i will get for Feb....which is not the best stress treatment. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mo Murphy Posted February 25, 2014 Share Posted February 25, 2014 Good to see you back Jason Mo Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted February 25, 2014 Share Posted February 25, 2014 Well done Jason, I really wish you all the best. I just wanted to say that it must have taken great courage to post your story here. But its clear that doing so has helped you i think, and been thought provoking for those who followed it. I'm touched and heartened how our community has rallied round and shown a sensitive side to our otherwise rough, tough off-roader stereotype. So with all of that in mind, i'll admit that i had a pretty awful 2013. Separation, divorce, moving etc all of which has left me with chronic insomnia and moderate depression. I've been signed off work for the last 6 weeks, and trying to use this time to get myself back on the rails. I hope i still have a job when its time to go back. I also think that you were fortunate with the support your employer gave you. For me it has been nothing like that. My boss(es) didnt know really how to deal with it, and i got very little practical support. The worst of which was the crappy sickpay scheme left me without pay for January, and not sure when or how much i will get for Feb....which is not the best stress treatment. Thank you also for your honesty, the reason I spoke out was I am afraid selfish, I was determined to show that just because you are having issues coping with life for whatever reason does not mean that you are one missed medication away from going on a killing rampage!! My admission to a secure unit, was the start of my treatment and was for my protection not the protection of others, but I was shocked when some chose to 'cross the road' to avoid the loon! If my admission however has also helped others realise that they are amongst friends then all the better for us all. I too suffer from insomnia, I am currently lucky to get two hours sleep despite the medication, this however goes to show how out of kilter my body is and that although I have 'mental Health' issues it is in fact a chemical Imballance that is causing the issues, and I just need a bit of tuning with medication. Once this is achieved hopefully my sleep and mood will improve. This imbalance does not make me weak or a lesser person, despite what I feel about myself, it can happen to anyone any age of any background it's just that. I hope you get the work thing sorted, and whilst it does not help with the cash situation I am not sure if you are aware that you have a legal protection under the dissiblity discrimination act 2010 which covers mental health and affords you some protection from being fired for being sick. Jason Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cyberprog Posted February 25, 2014 Share Posted February 25, 2014 Welcome back Jason, was only thinking of you the other day as I fitted my LED lights from the last group buy. One of these days I'll get round to fitting the light bar! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jbs Posted February 25, 2014 Share Posted February 25, 2014 Jason, Nice to see you're back and fighting it all the way too mate. John Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
andy2986 Posted February 26, 2014 Share Posted February 26, 2014 Really glad to see you back Jason. Andy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maverik Posted February 26, 2014 Share Posted February 26, 2014 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
muddychris300tdi Posted February 26, 2014 Share Posted February 26, 2014 Nice to see an update. :-) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
simonr Posted February 26, 2014 Share Posted February 26, 2014 "some chose to 'cross the road' to avoid the loon!" I think that may just be you rather than the illness Si Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CwazyWabbit Posted February 26, 2014 Share Posted February 26, 2014 "some chose to 'cross the road' to avoid the loon!" I think that may just be you rather than the illness Si In fairness Si that may just be to avoid most of us Land Rover types Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FridgeFreezer Posted February 26, 2014 Share Posted February 26, 2014 just because you are having issues coping with life for whatever reason does not mean that you are one missed medication away from going on a killing rampage!! I often feel one medication away from a killing rampage, usually by about half way along the M27 or 30 seconds into a visit to Sainsburys. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CwazyWabbit Posted February 26, 2014 Share Posted February 26, 2014 Well done Jason, I really wish you all the best. I just wanted to say that it must have taken great courage to post your story here. But its clear that doing so has helped you i think, and been thought provoking for those who followed it. I'm touched and heartened how our community has rallied round and shown a sensitive side to our otherwise rough, tough off-roader stereotype. So with all of that in mind, i'll admit that i had a pretty awful 2013. Separation, divorce, moving etc all of which has left me with chronic insomnia and moderate depression. I've been signed off work for the last 6 weeks, and trying to use this time to get myself back on the rails. I hope i still have a job when its time to go back. I also think that you were fortunate with the support your employer gave you. For me it has been nothing like that. My boss(es) didnt know really how to deal with it, and i got very little practical support. The worst of which was the crappy sickpay scheme left me without pay for January, and not sure when or how much i will get for Feb....which is not the best stress treatment. Hope things start to turn out better for you in 2014 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted February 26, 2014 Share Posted February 26, 2014 "some chose to 'cross the road' to avoid the loon!" I think that may just be you rather than the illness Si Probably true Si, I just notice it now!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mmgemini Posted February 26, 2014 Share Posted February 26, 2014 Good to hear from you Jason. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
honitonhobbit Posted February 26, 2014 Share Posted February 26, 2014 Glad you're on the rise old lad Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mickeyw Posted February 26, 2014 Share Posted February 26, 2014 Good to hear things are looking better. I agree with CW, dirty finger nail therapy could have some merits Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snagger Posted February 27, 2014 Share Posted February 27, 2014 Jason, this is the first time I have seen this thread - I have only recently started viewing this part of the forum. I salute your strength of character. Depression is a sneaky illness, quite hard to spot, especially for the sufferer, just like you said. And, also as you said, the way it manifests itself is damaging to your own support group, making things worse. It's self reinforcing. Often, by the time the sufferer recognises what's happening, irreversible damage has been done. I'm very sorry to see this has happened to you too. You had the integrity and strength to seek help once you realised your predicament, and have shown tremendous courage to be so open about it. There is a stigma to mental health issues, not helped by the Victorian images of institutions like Bedlam. Of course, just like physical illnesses, there are many types and many degrees of illnesses, so it is awful that the mere mention of mental illness conjures up images of The Shining or Over the Cuckoos Nest - it's just not like that in most cases. The reality is that many people will experience something at some point that brings on a level of illness, though for most it will be milder than you have suffered. Once they have been through it, it will give enough of an insight that they will understand exactly what you are going through and to judge you positively, not negatively, because of how you have handled it and shown such resilience. It sounds like your life has hit rock bottom, between the illness, divorce and work news. However, you have also learned to look with a fresh perspective - you have learned you have some true friends, you have appreciated some support from your employer, knowing they didn't abandon you, you have learned some new skills in managing your mental state, and most importantly, you have a blossoming new relationship with your boy, which is always the most important thing in the life of any parent. So, I think you are well equipped to face the challenges placed before you. Well done - you're a good example of how people can bounce back from bad things and be better for it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted February 27, 2014 Share Posted February 27, 2014 Thanks again guys, for the messages of support, I really do appreciate them. I put the defender on charge yesterday and began the task of clearing it out, today will involve cleaning and starting to give her a service before I start to plan for summer trips. Jason. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
muddychris300tdi Posted March 1, 2014 Share Posted March 1, 2014 I'm sure getting behind the wheel of your defender again and getting out will put a smile on your face. I did enjoy reading your thread on your 110. Chris. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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