My Health

[Diff]

I am full of admiration for you Jason and I hope everything improves for you.

Regards,

Diff.

[=jon=]

All the best Jason, glad you are on the mend

Let me know when you feel up for a cuppa and a natter, I promise not to cause anguish by parking the LC in front of the house again (should be easy, cos it's gone - but replaced with something else non Solihull-esque!)

[Happyoldgit]

I appreciate your taking the time to share with us Jason. I hope that your journey to complete recovery is swift.

[Anderzander]

I'm pretty anonymous on here these days, but I do want to add my support and well wishes.

Well done and keep on keeping on.

[Maverik]

Hi Jason, I wish you all the best in your continued recovery, it takes a strong character for you to speak out.

All the best

Chris (Mav)

[Daan]

Best wishes, the forum is always here for some light reading and mickey taking. Sure we will meet one day.

Daan

[Diablo]

Good on you for getting things seen to Jason. Takes a strong character to do that, let along putting it on a forum too.

Glad you're getting the help you need now, god forbid what it might have been.

Life gives us some tough challenges, let's hope you cruise through this one in the coming months

[elbekko]

Best wishes Jason, a very thought-provoking post.

[nickwilliams]

'No man is an iland, intire of it selfe; every man is a peece of the Continent, a part of the maine; if a clod bee washed away by the Sea, Europe is the lesse, as well as if a Promontorie were, as well as if a Mannor of thy friends or of thine owne were; any mans death diminishes me, because I am involved in Mankinde; And therefore never send to know for whom the bell tolls; It tolls for thee....'

John Donne, Meditation 17 (1624)

Best wishes, Jason.

I may not comment on your threads very often, but I do always read and enjoy them.

Nick.

[Troll Hunter]

Jason,

It sounds as if you're well on the road to recovery, since you're already contributing to the forum. Welcome back. Long may your progress continue.

Mike

[task]

I can only echo the above, I don't know you but I have always enjoyed your posts and like to think there is some kind of "forum kinship". It must have taken a lot of courage and shows a true strength of character. I wish you the best and hope that the days get brighter!

[BigP]

Jason, another stranger with admiration for your honesty; it's all too easy using another illness to cover up depression. I too am finding things very difficult just now but take one day at a time & strength from my wife and kids. The 'Black Dog' , (google it), is an unwelcome friend.

Take care and rest, your body & mind need time to heal.

P

[Guest]

Thanks again guys,

Your words have greatly lifted me when I have been down, it's easy to lose perspective and think that you are alone, or a failure for not being able to cope with life espicialy in the low times. I guess mental illness gets you in that way, with a broken leg you can see the break on an x-ray you can't see a broken mind, and they break in many different ways.

It's also difficult to explain to people how you feel, the snap out of It and pull yourself together brigade, really don't help, but a friend brought me the black dog book which helped me explain things to my children.

My recovery is going well, I am attending day hospital/therapy and learning to cope with everyday situations, which you would think would be easy but I am having to learn again.

Warmest thanks, Jason

[simonr]

I've not come across the 'Black Dog' before!

There's a good video here:

Never mind a Black Dog, I've had a few times in my life I've been followed around by a bloody Dementor! (Harry Potter Reference!)

Si

[Guest]

I've not come across the 'Black Dog' before!

Never mind a Black Dog, I've had a few times in my life I've been followed around by a bloody http://harrypotter.wikia.com/wiki/Dementor]Dementor[/url]! (Harry Potter Reference!)

Si

Si, the clip is the black dog book put into a video, the book is great and really helped Mrs S explain to Jacob what was 'wrong' with me.

Jason

[Guest]

Transport collected me on time and I went to the ward council meeting today, the good news is that I have now been released from the secure unit and into the care of the crisis team/day hospital.

This is great news as we all agree that I am no longer a danger to myself (well apart from the normal DIY dangers) and that I am able to cope on 'the outside' with the support framework that has been put in place. This has made me feel really positive that I have taken a huge step forward, the doctors are positive and feel that it is unlikely that I will need to return to the secure unit, which has also given me a lift. As although I understand why I was in the unit it is not a place I would wish on my worst enemy.

They have adjusted my medication again in a hope I will get more sleep and be lifted more during the day, so I guess it will take a few days before I notice the effects.

I still have a long way to go but feel I have crossed a major turning point in my recovery.

I would again like to thank my wife family and friends for all of their support over the last few months, without their help I wouldn't be here today which is a sobering thought.

Thanks, Jason

[CwazyWabbit]

Jason, the world would be a poorer place without you and I am very glad you are still here and happy that you have accomplished another major milestone. It's so nice to see you starting to contribute to the forum again as well. Best of wishes for your continued progress mate and thanks for letting us all know how things are progressing, you should be rightly proud of yourself.

[cackshifter]

Jason, very well done, a milestone passed. Best wishes for the future,

[JSG]

Hi Jason,

Firstly, I hope things are improving and good on you for having the courage to post this.

As someone who has met you I'd like to echo what has been said and if you fancy a chat or a beer remember I'm only just down the road so just email or PM me.

Cheers,

John

[JeffR]

Well done mate

[Simon_CSK]

Jason

Like others I don't know you. I have never suffered from depression however I do have dyslexia which in my early years affected severely my self confidence. Unlike most I do appreciate what goes on in the head and appreciate even if I do not understand the difficulties that you have. Your friends will always support you and having read the support of the forum I think the more supported that you have the better you should feel.

Like everyone else has said a speedy recovery and stick with it we are all behind you.

[crclifford]

jason,

glad to hear you are on your way to good health. it was great to meet you and if you need help with your landy or you head up past Melton Mowbray then pop in for a brew. The kettle will be on always.

all the best

[Guest]

Yesterday I hit rock bottom again, after such a good week it hit me like a sledge hammer, my world seemed to implode again. I am not posting this for people to feel,sorry for me but to encourage anyone going through the same to take one day at a time. I know that everyone says this and it seems like a clechie but it is so true.

Later in the day I was able to put things in perspective thanks to a lass I used to work with in the RAF and haven't spoken to in years, she sent me a PM on Facebook that really helped and just goes to shows that help can come from anywhere.

Although I have had just over three hours sleep, today feels like a completely different day, I feel positive again and am looking forward to the day. I'm not back up there again but am back on the road to recovery albeit a couple of miles back from where I was last week I know that I have been there before so know how to get there again.

Jason.

[BigP]

A day or an hour at a time, it will take as long as it takes. Don't try rushing it as you're only putting pressure on yourself.

Paul

[Guest]

As I have had a few PM's I thought I should update you on how things are going today I was formally released from all crisis care and into the hands of the Community Mental Health Team, there is still a lot of work to do but they will be looking after me from this point on. It's another big milestone on the road to recovery so has lifted my mood greatly somewhat.

I have learnt so much about myself over the last few weeks, I have learnt how to release the anger that so often consumed me, I have learnt how to meditate (something I thought was Holcomb but really helps find inner peace)

I have learnt how destructive I have been to the people around me my friends and especially my family, that's what depression does it hides in the corners and attacks everything you hold dear to you.

It makes you destructive not just to your self but to all you meet you grip onto anything you can control and try and overcompensate which in turn makes you lie and deceive to make people believe you are in control. You strive for perfection and take on far more than you can ever be expected of any human just to show that you are good enough and can cope, until you destroy everything around you that you love because the pain you internalise eats you.

It makes you loose all perspective on life and what is important and you end up focusing on the wrong things, until it consumes you and you don't think life is worth the battle it has become, and take steps to end the battle. It then becomes a fine line as to which way you go, and if you make it through to admittance of your illness and then you can start to get help.

If you are feeling any of these thoughts go an get help speak to someone before its too late and you have destroyed everything you hold dear and They have no strength to support you and have to walk away for their own sanity and health.

Over the past two weeks the fog has lifted and the blocks have fallen into place and I realise all that I had become over the last couple of years and how this has damaged the people I love the most my wife and children my only hope now is that they can forgive me, that my actions over the coming weeks show how much I have learnt and how wrong I have been, and how strong I have become.

I thank everyone that has supported me over the past few years, everyone who has been there for me when I have needed them and I have not shown them the appreciation they deserve.

I have the rest of my life to look forward to what ever happens, I have so much damage to repair trust to rebuild and love to repay.

But Saturday the 18th of May 2013 became the first day of the rest of my new life, and whatever it brings I am not going waste a single minute of my life looking back on the bad times but looking forward and being the best person I can be.

Jason.